Emotionless Stoics.
"Stoicism isn't about being emotionless; in fact, it's the opposite; you feel strong emotion, but you choose to be indifferent to it and act rationally."
This is a common misconception when men try to apply the stoic philosophy to their lives. Men are not supposed to feel nothing in a moment of inspiration or anger or joy, but we are not to lose our wits in those moments, which is where the application of rational thought comes in.
A man in a spirited debate is not supposed to kill the other because he disagrees with the opposing viewpoint, which is irrational. Men who have been leaders of other men are quick to make decisions and make corrections in conversation and applications for work and training. Those constructive corrections are essential and are rational to lead and grow as men.
When the debate turns for the worse and becomes a slew of insults and no longer about the progress of conversation or the solution to whatever problem it was. Remember, not everyone is good at separating their personal feelings when speaking about something they have experienced or were a part of or feel somehow connected to it.
When the condescending and name-calling begins, do everything in your power not to grab them by the ears and headbutt their fucking teeth into the back of their throat.
That would be irrational no matter how much pleasure you may receive from it.
Suppose my mother hadn't given me the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius straight after I got out of the Marines. I may have had a few charges on the record.
Now the point is you will feel emotions; however, reacting to them out of the instinct to destroy a man physically is not the move. The name-calling and the personal attacks signify the loser trying to drag you into some bullshit you have no time to waste on.
Use Tact; what does that mean?
It is a Marine Corps leadership principle.
Tact is the ability to change how you communicate for a given situation. You need to know when to prioritize efficiency above delicacy and vice versa. There is a time and place for every manner of acting, and you should have the moral principles needed to distinguish how to approach any given situation. To be tactful is to choose the best method of communication.
Tact includes knowing when the conversation and or problem will not be solved between the two parties. Identify when to break contact and climb down from the stupidity tree in a calm manner.
You are not to be men of apathy, feeling nothing and being void of all emotions like some damn living dead. You are to feel emotions and enjoy them, and some are useful as feedback to learn and remember a lesson. Do not be irrational in your response to the negative ones.
Seek Knowledge & Grow Strong.